Saline

i tried to shut you out but like the ends presage the means
i found you new. improved. and always there to set the scene.
and so i close my eyes. i never practice what i preach
until i find my time to place you safely beyond reach.

what can i do? you know the truth
saline. you kept me clean. you kept me underfed.
so clean. no matter what you said.
and hygiene. obsession never let compulsion do.
and i could never lie to you.

a place i've been before. a sight i've never seen
a dream of silent dark. a self i've never been.
i've always known the truth. i know that i've been blessed.
i've got my gloves cinched tight and folded hard across my chest.

what can i do? i thought you knew
saline. you kept me warm, you tied me to my bed.
so clean, the flesh beneath the skin.
and hygiene. profession never counted two and two.
and i could never lie to you.

the oxidation red. the hissing as it pours.
the skin i've scrubbed away. the thoughts i can't ignore.
the cruel and fickle fate. the fine and fancy free.
the grim and desperate. now maybe i can go to sleep.

what could i do? i thought you knew
saline. you kept me warm. you tied me to my bed.
so clean, the fear that you inject.
and hygiene, i've done it once, now what more can i do?
and i could never lie to you.